Everyone with email gets forwards. Some are worth reading, some worth passing on. Whether it made me think, smile or laugh, these are the ones that caught my attention. Which ones caught yours?

2.03.2008

When women lie

One day, when a seamstress was sewing while sitting close to a river, her thimble fell into the river. When she cried out, the Lord appeared and asked, "My dear child, why are you crying?" The seamstress replied that her thimble had fallen into the water and that she needed it to help her husband in making a living for their family. The Lord dipped His hand into the water and pulled up a golden thimble set with sapphires. "Is this your thimble?" the Lord asked The seamstress replied, "No."
The Lord again dipped into the river. He held out a golden thimble studded with rubies.
"Is this your thimble?" the Lord asked. Again, the seamstress replied, "No."
The Lord reached down again and came up with a leather thimble.

"Is this your thimble ?" the Lord asked. The seamstress replied, "Yes." The Lord was pleased with the woman's honesty and gave her all three thimbles to keep, and the seamstress went home happy.

Some years later, the seamstress was walking with her husband along the riverbank, and her husband fell into the river and disappeared under the water. When she cried out, the Lord again appeared and asked her, "Why are you crying?" "Oh Lord, my husband has fallen into the river!"
The Lord went down into the water and came up with George Clooney. "Is this your husband?" the Lord asked.

"Yes," cried the seamstress. The Lord was furious. "You lied! That is an untruth!" The seamstress replied, "Oh, forgive me, my Lord. It is a misunderstanding. You see, if I had said 'no' to George Clooney, you would have come up with Brad Pitt.

Then if I said 'no' to him, you would have come up with my husband. Had I then said 'yes,' you would have given me all three. Lord, I'm not in the best of health and would not be able to take care of all three husbands, so THAT'S why I said 'yes' to George Clooney.
And so the Lord let her keep him.
The moral of this story is:

Whenever a woman lies, it's for a good and honorable reason, and in the best interest of others. That's our story, and we're sticking to it.

signed~
All Us Women

Rest is important


TIRED DOG

An old, tired-looking dog wandered into the yard. I could tell from his collar and well-fed belly that he had a home. He followed me into the house, down the hall, and fell asleep in a corner.

An hour later, he went to the door & I let him out.

The next day he was back, resumed his position in the hall, and slept for an hour. This continued for several weeks.

Finally, my curiosity got to me and I pinned a note to his collar:
"Every afternoon your dog comes to my house for a nap."

The next day he arrived with a different note pinned to his collar:
"He lives in a home with 10 children, He's trying to catch up on his sleep. Can I come with him tomorrow??"

Prioritize your problems

We all get those heart-tugging emails at holiday time about Life Lessons. Well, the message below came across my computer at work via a listserver for college counselors. It's not a forward, technically, though I hope it will be....

the message:
Last night as I got back in my car after working out at the gym, I checked my phone as I always do. On the screen it read, "PLEASE CALL" from my wife, Lisa. This was highly unusual to see a text from Lisa, as she has never once done so. My heart began to pound, and my hand started to shake, as I tried to find the talk button to call her.

The phone rang 5 times and then the voice mail activated. After leaving the short message of "Call Me Now" on her phone I hung up, only knowing that something had happened to one of my children. As I sat in the parking lot of Ballys, I redialed the phone. After 4 rings Lisa answered with "Paul" to which I replied, "What is Wrong". That is when the words that no parent wants to hear came out, "Kenzie was in a wreck".

Last night, my oldest daughter MacKenzie was in an accident, without going in to the long details I will tell you this...

As she went, what appears to be under the semi, it's tire must have drove up on the back bumper, on her side of the vehicle, which shattered the rear window. The rubber marks on the rear quarter panel show that the truck then must have slide back down forcing her car to shoot back out. She then spun counter clock wise hitting a guard rail, then coming to a rest.

As I sat looking at the car last night, with MacKenzie standing next to me, un-hurt, it dawned on me, that my little girl, could have very well been taken away from us last night. In less time than it takes to say, I love you, she could have been literally been run over, and crushed by the truck, and life would have forever changed.

MacKenzie, apologized to me last night for "Wrecking" a car...My reaction,
"I Love You". I then simply asked her to try and remember this, "Prioritize your problems. A wrecked car is not a problem at all, it is an inconvenience, at best.

Why am I sending this to you this morning... I have no clue, other than to say...

Every day, we sit in our offices, we work hard, we have meetings, we live in chaos. Every day, is how can we sell more of this, or do more of that. Then we rush out once a year to buy presents for our kids, friends, co workers, and for people we do not even know, thinking that this exchange of products somehow makes a difference in people's lives, and sometimes it may.

I for one have allowed many things to take my focus off of what is important, and what is not, this year. I have ignored people I shouldn't, and I have allowed things to bother me that just are not worth the bother. I have forgotten what is important, and allowed my stubbornness, and pride to take control of my life at times.

Every year I try to sit back and reflect what the past 12 months have allowed me to accomplish, and this year I must say, I felt I have accomplished very little, until last night. Last night showed me that no matter what is parked in my garage, or what my garage is attached to, the true gift is who, not what, is in the house.

I appreciate those of you on this list very much, and I just wanted you to know that.
Have a happy Holiday, I know I will!
Paul Jones
ACCA-l
12.07

Oh, the effect they have

This originally came to me with the heading that only women of a certain age would appreciate this. I disagree. I think only a certain age would empathize, but all could sympathize. We all have our Paul Newman's, Robert Redford's, Clark Gables, etc, etc, etc...


Paul Newman


Only women of a certain era will fully appreciate this true story. (if you don't understand this, tell your mother, she'll get it)

A Michigan woman and her family were vacationing in a small new England town where Paul Newman and his family often visited.

One Sunday morning, the woman got up early to take a long walk. After a brisk five-mile hike, she decided to treat herself to a double-dip chocolate ice cream cone.

She hopped in the car, drove to the center of the village and went straight to the combination bakery/ice cream parlor.

There was only one other patron in the store.
Paul Newman, sitting at the counter having a doughnut and coffee.

The woman's heart skipped a beat as her eyes made contact with those famous baby-blue eyes.

The actor nodded graciously and the star struck woman smiled demurely.

Pull yourself together! She chides herself. You're a happily married woman with three children, you're forty-five years old, not a teenager!

The clerk filled her order and she took the double-dip chocolate ice cream cone in one hand and her change in the other. Then she went out the door, avoiding even a glance in Paul Newman's direction.

When she reached her car, she realized that she had a handful of change but her other hand was empty.
Where's my ice cream cone? Did I leave it in the store? Back into the shop she went, expecting to see the cone still in the clerk's hand or in a holder on the counter or something. No ice cream cone was in sight.

With that, she happened to look over at Paul Newman.
His face broke into his familiar warm friendly grin and he said to the woman,




"You put it in your purse."

Find peace in yourself... or else.

45 year old woman had a heart attack and was taken to the hospital. While on the operating table she had a near death experience.

Seeing God she asked "Is my time up?"

God said, "No, you have another 43 years, 2 months and 8 days to live."

Upon recovery, the woman decided to stay in the hospital and have a face-lift, liposuction, breast implants and a tummy tuck. She even had someone come in and change her hair color and brighten her teeth!

Since she had so much more time to live, she figured she might as well make the most of it.

After her last operation, she was released from the hospital. While crossing the street on her way home, she was killed by an ambulance.

Arriving in front of God, she demanded, "I thought you said I had another 43 years? Why didn't you pull me from out of the path of the a ambulance?"



God replied:

"I didn't recognize you."

Every Breath Truly is a Gift from God

'I Hope You Dance... '

This was written by an 83-year-old woman to her friend.

*The last line says it all. *

Dear Bertha,

I'm reading more and dusting less. I'm sitting in the yard and admiring the view without fussing about the weeds in the
garden. I'm spending more time with my family and friends and less time working.

Whenever possible, life should be a pattern of experiences to savor, not to endure. I'm trying to recognize these moments now and cherish them.

I'm not "saving" anything; we use our good china and crystal for every special event such as losing a pound, getting the sink unstopped, or the first Amaryllis blossom.

I wear my good blazer to the market. My theory is if I look prosperous, I can shell out $28.49 for one small bag of groceries. I'm not saving my good perfume for special parties, but wearing it for clerks in the hardware store and tellers at the bank.

"Someday" and "one of these days" are losing their grip on my vocabulary. If it's worth seeing or hearing or doing, I want to see and hear and do it now

I'm not sure what others would've done had they known they wouldn't be here for the tomorrow that we all take for granted. I think they would have called family members and a few close friends. They might have called a few former friends to apologize and mend fences for past squabbles. I like to think they would have gone out for a Chinese dinner or for whatever their favorite food was.

I'm guessing; I'll never know.

It's those little things left undone that would make me angry if I knew my hours were limited. Angry because I hadn't written certain letters that I intended to write one of these days. Angry and sorry that I didn't tell my husband and parents often enough how much I truly love them. I'm trying very hard not to put off, hold back, or save anything that would add laughter and luster to our lives. And every morning when I open my eyes, tell myself that it is special.

Every day, every minute, every breath truly is a gift from God.

If you received this, it is because someone cares for you. If you're too busy to take the few minutes that it takes right now to forward this, would it be the first time you didn't do the little thing that would make a difference in your relationships? I can tell you it certainly won't be the last.

Take a few minutes to send this to a few people you care about, just to let them know that you're thinking of them.

"People say true friends must always hold hands, but true friends don't need to hold hands because they know the other hand will always be there."

Life may not be the party we hoped for, but while we are here we might as well dance